A philosophy. Of sorts.

I never do stand holding
umbrellas in lightning storms
or crowded elevators
though it may come as a shock

and I remain leery of men
who pair paisley neckties
with argyle socks

I never found it worth dating
a girl based on the reflection of
her patent leather shoes

and I am always wary of
gum-chewing Avon ladies sporting
fresh Harley Davidson tattoos.